Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Na Na NA Na, HEY HEY HEY GOODBYE

So I’ve been delaying putting this up on my blog because it’s kinda private and I didn’t want to talk about it online. However it’s eating me up and I need a way to vent. So here is goes. One of my brothers is moving to another country in less than 2 weeks, and I’m really upset by this. It’s understandable that I’m going to miss him, but it’s like eating me up. I mean the move is only for a year and he is supposed to come home every few months so I really shouldn’t be freaking out but I am. He lives in another state as it is so basically I will see him just as often this year as I do normally. I know you must be wondering why I am like this but I am leaving a few details out of the picture. My brother is moving to a country that is not the safest place to live right now. He’s not in the military or anything like that, but he will be working in a dangerous location and the chances of him getting hurt are much greater than if he were living in America. I don’t really want to say where he is going, I mean I can if I wanted, but I want to try to keep myself anonymous and I don’t want to give specific details away. Hence, me not wanting to write about this. So last night was the last time I got to see him until Sept. And I was really emotional about it. So much so that I was actually tearing up on my way home to see him. I actually wore sunglasses on the train so people couldn’t see my eyes. Which I hate it when people wear sunglasses in a place that’s not sunny, but the situation warranted it. It also didn’t help the fact that someone got me all wound up at work before I left.

As you know I just recently came back from a pretty long vacation. Well I wasn’t really planning on taking any more days off in the near future but on Sunday my mom told me that my brother is coming home for the last time on TUESDAY. I thought he would come home on the weekend to say goodbye cause that’s what normal people do. Nope my brother decided to come home in the middle of the week when the rest of us work. So I asked my boss if I could leave a few hours early. I didn’t want to take a half-day or a full day off, so we worked it out that if I came in earlier than usual the whole week, I could leave early and not actually take a day. So it’s a win-win. Now this whole thing was worked out between my boss and me. It is no one else’s business what I do with my days off. However as I was getting ready to leave one of my teammates decided to comment on my departure. He said something along the line of “Wow, looks like something is getting A LOT of special privileges lately. It must be nice taking all these days off. I can’t believe you’re already taking a day off since your vacation.” So my boss told him that I was going to see my brother and he just snickered. Yes he actually snickered. And I was and still am furious at that. I didn’t elaborate on anything else because it is none of his business, and plus I thought I might cry. But who does that? I never say anything about the fact that he comes in to work 30 minutes late every day. Or how he is constantly chatting to his girlfriend instead of doing work.

So why is he saying that to me?? I am already sensitive about this whole thing as it is, and here he is making it worse. I also think he is talking about me behind my back. I know it sounds so childish, but I KNOW he is doing this. And if he has something to say, say it to MY FACE. I hate people who are cowards and talk about people behind their back. It’s immature and hurtful. So I don’t know what to do. I HATE confrontation but this whole thing is driving me crazy. Plus there is no way to prove this guy is talking about me behind my back. But, it is making me even more miserable at my job.

So what should I do?? Right now I’ve just been keeping to myself a lot more, but I still feel awful. What kills me the most is this teammate was someone I used to consider my work buddy. He was the one I talked to the most, and now I cannot stand him. I rarely change my opinions about people, but I went from having a great friendship to no longer talking to him.

2 comments:

Karen said...

I am sorry about your brother. I don't know what I would do if my brother or sister were going away. I will keep him my thought and pray that he returns safely.

As for you co-worker...Seriously, F--k him! He needs to mind his own business and not worry about what privilleges you are getting.

Anonymous said...

I agree, your co-worker should mind his own business and quit it with the attitude. You don't need to defend yourself, you had an arrangement with your boss, he shouldn't be involved.

I'm sorry to hear about your brother moving too. I can't imagine having my brother move away like that. Will have have internet access/phone at least? Skype is pretty cool for things like that.